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Dust Jacket

by Joel P West

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1.
I stood under a yellow stoplight 25th and C On my right was a pink desert moonrise On the other was a cold blue sea Neither one could have made much change inside me Either way my eyes looked tired and lonely I waited on an empty doorstep On the 21st at sunset I felt around the dirty cement For any pieces of any old sentiment The city roar rambled on and on And so I stood sadly sipping on a soft song Open up cause my hands are freezing And I’m not sure what I believe in I stood here two years ago It looked nothing like this before I woke up in a lonely basement 28th and NE Davis I woke up as a black silhouette Just a shadow and I’m not proud of that I have shelves of other people’s words I left myself somewhere in between the bold ones
2.
Paper Boats 04:29
So I’m leaving here to be alone, to be unknown Cause when the evening clouds are low the restless city makes the whole sky glow I pull my curtains tight to block out the light I can feel the night watching me write Watching my wandering eyes fight sleep I’ve tried to see my bones at home, but they won’t show So I figured I could find myself with a thumb out to the cold ring road With topographic maps with home on my back Now I’m stuck in tourist traps, following tracks In someone else’s past I boast And fold my hope In paper boats Then I float back to my doubts My faults they follow me around the same a year ago as they are now I’ve tired myself to find someplace to hide But when I’m out of sight, I’m out of my mind Finally alone and Sinking slow In paper boats
3.
Don't follow please Cause I wander aimlessly toward the lights of the city The heat of the buildings, the sound of the sea And the seabirds see me And they can see three hundred thousand surrounding me Making an island of my tongue and my bare feet The hummingbird hides in the orange tree While the raven is shouting his plea And we watch from our window for someone to lead But they're never quite what we need The night makes it clear That I won't fool anyone here full of my foreign fear In the dusk light hiding I wont disappear Love drives out fear But fear steals from love and my scared heart has taken so much That my arms can't hold up the weight So there are tired dark trees that surround me And they’re growing the loneliest things I lay in between them and try and find sleep But the roots come up from underneath I hide in the black earth I hide in the seed I hide in my sunburn I hide incomplete Our dreams dig deep in a rainbow But we clothe ourselves in blue and gray They say it's shame that is keeping us safe But it's shame that keeps us locked away
4.
I missed the six o'clock So I watched the city wake from the one hundred block While a man preached to the pigeons about why the war is wrong When the next train came I left And then I found a seat that faced the great Los Angeles The motion calms my eyes and draws my sight out toward the west Where I see the tall palm trees Planted there to make the coast what it’s supposed to be But California hides her dry skin under covers of old magazines Don’t believe her She will bury you alive in shame if you let her Down Underneath crowds I see children in the waves They run into them then they turn their backs and run away They stretch their milky skin out in the ripened summer rays But I sleep all afternoon There are Greco-Roman statues in my living room And I wash but there are spots left on the glasses we don’t use Regret slips round my neck Then it scratches and it pulls me into a circle Here Drawn on top of us with a compass Every time I sleep icons hang over my bed so Every time I speak I expect a new paragraph I see myself in these photographs With soft washed light and I am always smiling
5.
Pinhole 05:18
I'll be damned if the fire can get me I am hiding under a holy prophecy I have a wet coat, I have a loose tooth I have a white wall, I have a bright red roof And a steeple pointing up to a higher truth I drove west with a girl who's missing all the same things Out in a cold sea breeze we flee She has some black dogs, she has a red car We saw some green light between the northern stars And we paused unconscious of who we are Inside our minds there is light from all sides We will wait for a place to discover our thoughts Until our hearts become overdue I have a stiff chair, I have a clean spoon I have a wood floor inside a borrowed room And across the sea there is nothing new Don't tell me that a building is capable Of holding all of the time that forms our bones Home is an old song, home is a palm stroke I am a pinhole, I let the light in slow We glow with whatever we’ve ever known Inside our minds there is light from all sides
6.
I write these words but you, you’ll never read them I sing these songs but you, you’ll never hear them Sometimes I lie, but you, you don’t believe me I know that you know that I, I speak way too easy When the wind was where we were we turned In my own home I hide embarrassing pictures I keep my lights so low I don’t see the textures When the when was where we were we turned We know that time don’t make us men We wish we knew where to begin All the light competes to catch our eyes When the wind was where we were we turned I watched a man lie to both of his children We pay a price to find our satisfaction
7.
Pine Marten 02:28
Lovely flakes are floating in the cold between the homes of people I don’t know I pull up my coat And head inside alone From my window I can see the geese; they’re pulling weeds between the wet reeds The river fills Their beaks with what they need My hands are stained with blood and when I try to scrub them my dry skin breaks open And bleeds All over me and my trembling body Oh my God they’re sleeping in the street because I wont give up my luxuries Who could say no To opportunity
8.
The sun is drawing lines in the morning All through the dust that floats in between The rooms of every house I have lived in The gold light lets me see There are no leaves left up in the aspens And every sail is tied to a mast The winter wind has nothing to boast with The lakeshore laps so silent That we hear our breath when we’re walking We can feel our noses turn red In shallow water we see reflections The January sunset turns The ripples pink on their faces But on their backs they’re painted in black I see both sides from here I can taste them Rich and full with what I have and what I lack The sun comes carefully with the morning The forest floor waits patient for light It will expose the bones without warning They were covered up all night with snow That’s melting down from the long boughs The fingers of the pines are relieved The branches bend back where they belong now They have stretched but they’re not worried Every tree has wounds from the winter We shed old needles under our feet Nobody ever judges a victim So our warm breath scribbles Secrets in the frosty air that surrounds us They whisper white and then disappear Against the lights of luxury houses Honest words throw sparks at fear but blows it out as soon as fire shows so Don’t you blush, manzanita The cold exposure will free us Let’s peel our bark off together And dress our wounds with the feathers That fall from each other
9.
Fences claim they can separate the ownership of landscape The street lights shine and the sprinklers run all night Behind suburban walls and tall gates But a breeze decides if seeds will bloom or die, or scatter out and multiply When rain comes through to tap dance on my roof I’m stuck but I am satisfied to stay in Oh river we are grieving We’ve lost surprise here Our fruits are out of season We sell them all year We flee from fear The days grow long and sunshine is our song, the hot light makes our skin tight The house stays warm so we sleep on the porch And hope the stars will stay in our eyes through winter Oh river come and take me And make my eyes new I’m tired of resisting I’ve tried to bend you We’re afraid to see the blue lines Lead to the blue sea Cause we spend all of our time Trying to be something more than something There were fireflies in Brooke’s backyard that night We fought the hot July in Brooklyn with white wine And to think that I’ve been spending all my time Believing I decide what falls before my eyes All we’re after anymore is safe control But we have to trade our wonder for it we grow cold Oh river wash me deep down to the sea and let it wash me over
10.
The desert is lush It’s raining here In California The earth’s brittle crust Is dressed in green Southwestern flora I suppose that what grows Has always been there Underneath us I’m bound up inside The skylight taps A dripping heartbeat And up to my right There’s a light And it reminds me We have to adjust The earth is moving All around us Our flesh is made up Of cell and atom That came before us Don’t hold me to damage I have done here Or words I’ve said this past year; I have changed, dear. The cascades call me I smell the green I hear the whisper Of Douglas fir trees His ash is scattered In between them Anymore all I know To refer to Are the forests Now even those They are clearcuts They are meadows I just now saw the wildflowers

credits

released September 28, 2008

All songs written and arranged by Joel P West
Violin parts written by Joel P West and Kelly Bennett
3, 5, and 6 developed with Donovan Funkey, Kenny Laubbacher, and Kelly Bennett

Kelly Bennett played violin
Sam Shrader played violin on 2 & 10
Kelsey Smith played Drums
Tim Denny played Percussion
Mackenzie West sang
Karli Fairbanks sang
Dan Friesen played upright bass
Jon Congdon played cello
Jon Titterington played piano and trumpet
Rebecca Alburn played piano on 2
Carrie Sluiter played flute on 2
Eric Nordby played banjo on 8
Trevor Spangle ripped paper on 5

Recorded in July 2008 by Kelsey Smith at Downbeat Sounds / Vancouver, WA
Mixed by Tim Denny at Downbeat Sounds except 1 and 3 mixed by Kelsey Smith
Mastered by Troy Glessner at Spectre Studio / Seattle, WA

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Joel P West San Diego, California

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